Letting go is extremely important, but for many people it is not easy to implement. This is especially true for perfectionists, which are women who are driven to be perfect in every matter. What also sets them apart is that if they are not able to fully commit to an issue, they give up and put off their plans. Mastering the art of letting go can make it much easier for them to achieve life balance.
How can you tell if you are a perfectionist?
Women who wonder if they are perfectionists should start by answering some basic questions, such as: Am I critical of myself? Do I expect perfection from myself and others around me? Am I sometimes disappointed when planned things do not go according to plan? Do I have unrealistic expectations of myself and others? Do I feel that no matter what I do, I am never good enough?
It is helpful to realize that perfectionism is based on a number of false, and worse, destructive beliefs. Why is it so difficult for perfectionists to let go? Part of the reason is that they live with the belief that one must be consistent and that once a task is started, it must be finished, regardless of other people’s feelings or one’s own health. Perfectionists are only satisfied with the best outcome. Anything less than their exacting standards is worthless. This makes them unable to let go for fear of going from perfect to hopeless (in their opinion)
Every perfectionist should also realize that letting go is not giving up. It is a conscious decision to allow time for better planning and detachment. What else characterizes perfectionists? They focus on what they did not do, what they could have done better, or what they did not get done in time, instead of appreciating the effort and seeing what they have already accomplished.
When is it worth letting go?
A huge problem for any perfectionist is deciding when to let go. When making this type of decision, the first thing to consider is what you are responsible for and what things require your full commitment. Everything else can be done well enough, delegated or let go. You should also ask yourself what you will achieve if you resign here and now. What we will gain in the long run is no less important
Another very important point is to consider what costs we will incur by giving up or lowering expectations and whether they will be acceptable to us. If not, can we do anything to prevent them or significantly reduce them. Which areas are worth considering when mastering the art of letting go? These include, but are not limited to: the relentless pursuit of success and wealth, wanting to be the perfect boss, employee, parent, or partner, analyzing what others think of us, committing to everything 100%, taking on all tasks, and wanting to be in control
How should all this look in practice? If you have been allocating a certain amount of time for the realization of a given challenge, it is worth trying to reduce it gradually and, for example, after 1 hour, do not make any amendments to the task and do not analyze the details. If you’ve been checking a particular thing, for example a document, 3 times, try to limit yourself to 2 times. Send it to the recipient and see what happens. It’s also worth considering what the worst-case scenario would be if we fail to perform a given task or perform it below our expectations.